You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
He woke me up at 4am just to lick my nipple. Then he talked in his sleep for 20 minutes about the sex we just had. I think it's safe to say he's a weird one, but I dont care cuz he fucks like a champ.
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
This reminds me of the time I was given a lap dance by a David Bowie drag king...
Sometimes you've gotta crawl to stay concious
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
i have paint on my face i'm missing my earrings, there's a bag of rice in my room, and i have a purse full of monopoly pieces
You're so sweet in the most vulgar ways
You waddled all the way home with your shoes in a construction cone. I'm glad to call you my Bestfriend.
You were telling everyone in the bar that Jess gave you scurvy.
Mom says you're allowed to come home if you replace the towels. I don't want to know why.
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