I told her it just looked small because my balls were gigantic. She bought it.
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
Two hours into move in day and the ambulance is here already.
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
If you ever bitch out on 72oz margarita night again, this friendship is over
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
He came into your room last night to tell me he was leaving, when I woke up this morning he was facedown in your hallway. He didn't make it very far.
He just asked me if I'd be interested in couples therapy. Fuck my life.
it looks like my getting laid tonight is going to depend on my knowledge of native birds. this is a weird party
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
So I was dancing on a table with these three girls and my bro. Started to makeout with one and as the song ended I asked what her name was. She said, and I quote, "Nate we hooked up two weeks ago". To which my reply was to lift my beer to bro and proclaim, "RAGE".
Randomize
