But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
you know whats weird about having a girlfriend....I look forward to masturbating now....sort of like quality me time.
I climb out of my sunroof. I mean its kind of embarrassing but part of me feels awesome and ninja like.
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
I think I need to stop sleeping with him. Sex with him is just a reminder of the mediocrity of the rest of my life.
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
I will not be a drunk bitch. I will not be a drunk bitch. Chanting this until it's second nature.
Drinking in moderation can be fun. Drinking in moderation can be fun. Chanting this until it becomes true.
you were crying saying "if you love me you will find me a loaf of bread"
Why are there jello shots in the kitchen drawer?
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
Banged a girl last night wearing nothing but my Team USA Olympic jersey. I think it's safe to say that nut was for America.
You weren't singing into a microphone in front of an audience. You were screaming into your fist in the check-out aisle in Walmart.
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
The neighbors ahemed the WHOLE time. Their kids are the ones that scream loud enough for me to remember my birth control. It's payback!
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