Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
hes so high that he's convinced hes a duck. hes squating in the bathtub quacking. that was NOT JUST pot.
It's gonna be pretty hard to find a homeless person that takes crackers as currency.
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
You are like the only girl I know who tells their booty call to go find another girl just cause you want more sleep.
So while you were living in this woman's apartment, you acquired a room mate, fucked her daughter, and killed her bunny. Worst sitter ever
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
That was the night I passed out and someone threw chicken at me. SORRY I wasn't available to cockblock you from that Hispanic dude.
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
It’s just hard to believe you really care about me when u haven’t touched my dick in 2 months
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