D3 body, D1 cock
I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
we're microwaving frozen margaritas its not the same without u
the bouncer made me realize that puking in line does not get you in any faster
I woke up naked this morning there was a baseball bat on the floor the bathroom door knob was removed and the floor was wet. This is why i don't do Tequila shots.
THIS IS THE EMERGENCY BOOZE SYSTEM. I AM EN ROUTE TO DEWITT WITH A FIFTH OF TEQUILA. THIS IS NOT A TEST
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
well hes been the bathroom for like 15 mins so he either feels comfortable enough to puke/ shit in my apartment or he escaped out the window
You put your finger on my lips and told me 'the butt is nature's pocket'.
I don't remember that at all, but I stand by what I said
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
All I've done today is nap, eat candy and get off from my vibrator. I didn't know it was possible to be THIS single.
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