do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
i just overheard my mom tell my dad he should drink less so he could hit the right hole
I'm a terrible person. There are two guys speaking sign language on the metro platform and at first I thought they were drunk and doing a silly dance.
i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
Beer bonged 7 shots of Jameson. I title this night short stories with tragic endings.
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
Whatever, I used my iphone to send an Escalade to pick up a booty call last week. For free. It is futuristic as fuck out here.
Thanks for taking care of me. I hope I didn't pee in your car.
Jenna, I'm going to use all my homosexual powers to steal him from you
Austin, I will climb on top of your shoulders and slowly suffocate you with my vagina
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
I had the bathroom of girls sing you happy birthday while you puked. I couldn't stop laughing. They were all so supportive
so on a scale from morning glass of wine to that time i burnt the garage down how drunk were you last night
About 'lets tie a boat to a truck and ride it down the freeway'
We are so disgustingly codependent and I wouldn't have it any other way
Randomize
