I just realized i haven't had sex in 2009. oh man thats embarrassing.
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
dude, i was at the student union last night trying to study but some retarded sorority spent an hour voting on the color of the seasons shirts like it was a UN meeting- someone motioned purple, someone objected, and half an hour later after 2 recounts they decided on purple
I just found $40 in the jeans I wore last night. PS I also found the jeans I wore last night.
Don't judge me. It was less weird than it sounds when we were in the moment and it was his birthday
Alright this has to stop. Without adderall I don't even have the motivation to get laid. College has ruined me.
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
I sent him a bunch of texts telling him that his beard wasn't long enough yet so we couldn't fuck and to text me back in a few hours if it had.
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
My vagina feels like a chupacabra ripped me apart using its mythological set of needle pointed teeth
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
I could have sworn that I went home last night... but judging from the couch I just woke up on, apparently not.
Randomize
