Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
Apparently I'm at the point in my life where I can wake up with a dick in my face and then go back to sleep
It's a 'fuck poison control' kind of night.
Gay bathhouses. They're actually a thing. So god does exist. And he doesn't hate me as much as you think he does
I deserve to be covered in dicks
Hooked up with a guy that looked like Dean Thomas. Mediocre at best, but I stopped myself from calling him Dean in bed. So I got that going for me.
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
I just have to point out that once I typed "fa" my phone filled in "fatass"
Hey.... can you explain to me why when I woke up this morning my cell phone background had been changed to me getting a piggy back ride from a drag queen?
I can't believe you tried to cock block me from A DIFFERENT TIME ZONE.
I am the most hated person in hoboken. Ive been doing drunken cake boss impressions down the street for the past 20 mins.
You told everybody that you were a dragon and then projectile vomited all over the kitchen.
She swallowed the car key because she thought we were really going to make her drive.
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
Randomize
