weed, chlorine, and victory. my bed smells like i had sex with michael phelps.
ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
It's just my hair. It brings natural happiness. Like goldfish, big boobs, and milkshakes.
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
Whoever put the picture of my dad in the condom box is an asshole
I forgot that I thought it would be a good idea to hairspray my toilet seat last night after I took 12 shots of vodka so when I just went to pee, I stuck to the toilet. Never drinking again.
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
Needs to be more caveman. "Me kill roommate. You watch. Then sex time with our genitals."
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
I'm going to target high, just in case I ask you where my paycheck went later
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