i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
gay flight attendant. racoons. kegels. bartender with missing teeth. too many birthdays. fucckk.
That point of drunk where you're in a bar bathroom and you're like "F*ck you bra! I'm not taking your sh*t anymore! and you take it off and throw it in a trashcan.
I didn't know he had a girlfriend until after we had sex when he said, "Man I really gotta stop cheating on my girlfriend."
I can't believe I left out the part about him peeing on the side of Route 2 at 3 a.m. while wearing a dress.
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
He was 6'8" - I shit you not! He sat up in my bed and the ceiling fan got him right in the forehead.
condom fairy costume came in handy...we were making out in my living room and he wanted it so i took a condom off the costume and we did it right there...with my tutu still on....
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