He ignores my calls like im some kind of stalker chick
Ive only called 5 times
All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
I'm tangled in a fishing net down at the harbor. This has nothing to do with Captain Morgan. Bring wirecutters.
You would be too ashamed to ever love me again if you saw the filth I just created. It brings unspeakable dishonor to the nacho dynasty. Like I raped the king's daughter, cut off her hands and made him eat them that's how hard I fucked up nachos.
Want to come over? I'm getting stoned and watching Netflix and making s'mores over a candle in my room
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
We were on the beach when you spilled sand in the bottle and said "relax it's vodka, it'll disinfect itself"
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
SOOOOOO I just attempted to go to the gym, hungover. Ended up throwing up in the bathroom. I hope people think I'm just working out really hard
Randomize
