..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
Whoever decided putting Tom Seizmore and Heidi Fleiss together in rehab should win some kind of award.
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
DUDE EDDIE MURPHY JUST DID A BODY SHOT OFF A HOOKER. IM NEVER COMING HOME
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
I was blowing him while he was singing Happy Birthday to his girlfriend on the phone. I win.
PA to anyone at the party last night and wondering where your pants are: they are in my backyard.
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
The Dick I got last night was so phenomenal that I had to take a fucking personal day today.
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
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