oh god the rape fog is back!
Do you think unemployment will give me a christmas bonus?
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
I cannot believe this. A potential 2016 Olympiad wants my vag. To which I respond "GO FOR THE GOLD"
you have to be that girl in the audience holding up the sign that says i fucked the shit out of you
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
Yea it's also hard to turn down a man asking you out with a chicken sandwich.
I'm shaving my vagina to the lion king soundtrack. How's your 9am?
I can't decide which is better: the sex, or remembering that I have ice cream in the freezer after he left
The modern romantic, surprising his gf w/ a gram of blow
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
dad says come back and get the lawn mower out of the pool before mom gets home
there's a bowling ball in the dishwasher and a dog bone in the freezer
Randomize
