Scream out, "Tax-Free dick over here" in the bar. Ladies love tax free stuff
I mixed the ketchup wit the mustard in one bottle to save time making hotdogs
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
I got cut off for calling the flower girl a slut. What are you doing?
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
Come over, I want to eat cookie dough off your dick.
I think my new low is running outside in a towel to pet a particularly fluffy looking squirrel and projectile vomiting off the balcony.
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
I swear to god if I have to repeat this to you one more mother fucking time I will flip fucking shit and acidic rain will pour down upon your mother fucking soul
I also fell asleep on the side of a tree so like I hit my lowest point there but it was a good time
Not as bad as when you were sitting in the pond getting fed water
Welp. It's confirmed. There is literally no lube on this entire island. Fuck me. More accurately, don't fuck me.
Remember, today is also the anniversary of Harambe's death. D**** out.
Randomize