Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
oh my god im such an asshole. i just asked the guitarist of bad religion if he was a scalper.
Not sure what happened last night, but there are four mini bikes outside and some guy is wearing my shirt passed out in the breakfast nook. Won't be telling the grand kids about this one.
Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
I feel like abortions should bother me more
Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
Dental hygienist just pulled two flakes of glitter out. And asked me how i've been doing with the divorce.
Let's just do a victory lap through all of our exes.
Woke up this morning buried in a mountain of chex mix and bubble wrap. We must have been doing something great last night
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
DO NOT THROW SOUP AT YOUR SCREEN
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
I just wiped my butthole and there was glitter down there.
Randomize
