My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
I'm going to make an art book filled with pics of me peeing in every bar bathroom I've ever been in. Dedicating it to you. You're welcome.
We have to have sex while I'm dressed as a tiger. It's one of my life goals
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
Your boyfriend and I are bonding over your giant dick.
There is a special place in Hell for whichever one of you put Ben Gay on my dildo. It was a very uncomfortable April 1.
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
Not entirely sure how I got drunk off 2 mimosas but here I am
He texted "fuck you" before blocking me on all social media. Come to think of it, that's also the last thing my mother said to me. Could it be that I'm the problem?
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
I really wish you were home bc youre the only friend I could ask to use an at home waxing kit on my vagina. I need you.
I can barely operate my hands; what makes you think I can operate my dick
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