Wearing these hooker shoes was a mistake
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
I bought this skirt with every intention to have it wrapped around my tits by the end of the night. So, I'm not a whore. I'm a self-fulfilling prophecy.
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
What do you take me for? I'm not trying to lure you into bed with stories of my dead aunt.
Let's be honest I'm gonna watch murder she wrote and eat taquitos at three am
I'm so upset I left my sombrero at the expo center
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
There were no words. I got in his car, took my pants off, threw my shirt out the window, and got things started. After we were done I collected my clothes, gave him a kiss, and crept back into my house.
You're like the sex ninja. How doesn't he love you?!
Just convinced the cute guy from class that I have prostate cancer. GET ME OUT OF THIS TOWN!
If you have been drunk at one point during the day and are going to bed sober that same day, something is very wrong.
Yes. I had to slow down my handjob so he would last...-and I give shitty handjobs to begin with
Randomize
