Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
Party was cancelled. Me and my dog are high as tits. Wanna go roam the outlet mall?
Just blew my age on the breathalyzer. I also have 8 stitches in my head. So worth a .22 though. All time record.
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
hey give me heads up if you're feeling vulnerable tomorrow night
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
I feel like if tampons weren't meant to be microwaved, they'd have a warning on the box, so we should be okay...
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
He cannot be your sugar daddy. He looks like a literal hot dog.
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
I'm going to force her to break up with me this week. Tonight I plan to shit the bed. If that doesn't work I'm not sure what's next.
She dry humped my leg in the raw while I was still dressed, came, and then fell asleep on top of me. All I got was a bruised thigh. 2020 needs to end.
Randomize