I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
I woke up and he had cut my bangs and put makeup on me.
I don't care how good they make you look, you've got to stop sleeping with gay guys.
I don't know the quality of the hand jobs you've received in the past but it CLEARLY was not one from me
You would not believe how incredibly hard it is to climb on top of a three story apartment buildings roof from the air conditioning unit
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
Did the game of beer pong go wrong before or after the cops and fire department showed up?
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
The cops knocked on our door just to ask us if we were really having a no-pants party.
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
I have shit my pants twice this week. #adulthood
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
This guy wants me to put ice under his foreskin. What!?
I never thought I'd be judging my neighbors sex lives before age 30 but here we are
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