someone get that fucking seahorse.
i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
It's like refusing a bong hit from michael phelps... You just can't do it
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
Also, my aunt grabbed my phone and downloaded the scriptures. Apparently I need Jesus.
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
I made the last cup in beer pong off the dude's hat. I also faintly remember rapping Forever by Drake during said game.
Timehop reminded me that 4 years ago today I helped a one armed man do the YMCA by being his other arm.
You're the best thing in my life, followed closely by cannabis and trashy romance novels
So today was the first day i've been sober since Wednesday according to my roommate!
Randomize