these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
Reason #84 I'm on my way to becoming a crazy cat lady: I called the police last night because I heard a noise and the cats were acting funny like they were trying to tell me something. The 3rd time the dispatcher repeated "the cats are acting funny?" I yelled and told her to have an officer ask the cats what happened.
she told me her two favorite things were grocery stores and dick.
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
I just compared his sexting to a plate of spaghetti. And he STILL wants to sleep with me.
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
We took her out for fresh air and next thing we knew, she was stumbling around the backyard picking dead leaves up off the ground and putting them in her shirt to "save them".
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
Randomize
