I wanna eat
then frost
then eat your cupcake
it sounded like he was fisting a can of crisco.
Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
That girl gave me her number because you were arrested. I am so proud of you dude.
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
Couple of things: my nipples are blue and knowing that at some point I'm going to have to poop is incredibly terrifying
Just saw you in traffic. You may have noticed me, I was the corpse driving the white car.
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
I think I just did my first walk of shame. He sent me home with a watermelon from his farm. Southern one night stands.
It can't be Friday yet, in still getting friend requests of people I don't remember from last weekend
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
I think you're literally the first guy to ever pick up a chick from pinterest.
He stopped mid-fuck to explain his choice in pillows. HE WAS STILL IN ME!
excused from jury duty. THAT hungover...
Randomize
