scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
He picked me up for our 1st date and saw my roommate crying on the floor Fabreesing her vagina...
I can't be the first person ever who had to explain why her bottle of orange juice had a picture of a screwdriver drawn on it
woke up with empty beer can still duct taped into my fists and the word "dove" written on the back of my neck
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
Well i would have gone to the bar but Satan decided to hold his rituals in my uterus.
I threw up in a flower pot outside the bar last night and have a date tonight....I think I missed something
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
How do you clean puke off a stuffed bear?
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
You literally brought me back to life and then fucked it out of me
Randomize
