i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
and then he said "my sister has the same underwear!" please come get me.
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
I definitely hasselhoffed a taco bell burrito on my kitchen floor in front of my dad and little brother.
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
I just try to date guys based on what I need like I am trying to find an electrician now
You gays are geniuses
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
I need your opinion, is it ACTUALLY sweet that a booty call offered to walk me home with an umbrella because it was raining, or is that just low standards?
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
I just bartered a blowjob for the ex-fiancée's engagement ring. FTW!
Randomize
