how do flat chested girls get laid?
I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
1. I feel like Jello 2. The girl i hooked up with last night isn't here and a different girl is lying next to me. 3. I have no clothes on 4. Can guys go on walks of shame?
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
I wore sweatpants. When I show up to a booty call in sweatpants there's your warning
Ugh did we play golf last night and did you by chance hit my head with a club or a ball?
He just remixed a spongebob song with 2 chainz..... Clearly I love him
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
want to know what my life has come to? I just took a 45 min shower banging on the walls and making loud sex noises so my neighbors think I get some.
I bruised my dick hopping over that fence last night
This snow needs to melt so I can get wasted on someones front lawn
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
So i dislocated my knee but still went home and fucked his brains out. Nothing gets in the way of my sex life. NOTHING.
I miss your drunken presence, and strong odor of hard liquor and potent weed.
Randomize
