im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
A slipped finger up the butt isn't the end of the world
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
Im in your car brotha dog. Its was unlocked, so im gonna sleep in it. well i mean i think its your car be your car.
Mym mom just came downstairs as I got ghome ans I'm trying to act SO CASUAL as i stabdh here hut icant help bur be like 'girl where's ther Turkey sandwiche s' haahaa
I literally need you to talke care of me soooo9o9oooooo drubj gril makin a sabdwiche. SO far its judst bred and paper towel...
i cant wait to be back in my element of drunk, on a barstool, ive missed home
Yep. How's your hangover?
It's like I fucked its sister and it's getting back at me.
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
I'm not sure drinking my way through west nile virus is the best idea. Oh well, already committed to that plan.
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
Drunk logic "let's go outside in front of the bar to get sick"
I'm going to avoid eye contact because my old high school English teacher is not who I feel like seeing after I just had a dick in my mouth
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Randomize
