Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
so i was dancing to the glee soundtrack with highheels. i tripped. and the dildo fell on my face. i dont know what happened.
I threw a jar of pickles out the window at a police car, why was that not a good enough reason to put me to bed?
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
Honestly, it was easier to just put it in my mouth than to deal with an awkward conversation.
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
I just found a half a joint in my bed. . .don't know if this qualifies as a proud moment or a cry for help
If you had a dick, I would hope it falls off and comes back to haunt you while fucking your ears at night. But you don't. But if you did, that's how mad I am at you
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
you told me I was being patronizing because I didn't want you to run barefoot across a construction site
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
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