Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
we just toasted to your mouth on alex's balls at the bar
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
Dude, I'm importing a boy from Oklahoma for my divorce party. It's like doctors without borders, but with dicks.
anyone who says having children is the best experience of their life obviously has never seen a vending machine carry vodka in Capri sun pouches.
I'm lying here drinking water from a shot glass..moving is not an option right now
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
Don't matter if she's straight, I'll get her. I'm not called The Transformer for nothing
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
Pizza rolls are incredible. They are like sex, except I have them sometimes
The fact that you walked around talking like Barbie and still got laid amazes me.
He's like... An octopus that touches my vagina in all these diff ways at the right times. It's almost unsettling
I told her we had to stay at the bar until at least midnight because that's when my direct deposit hit, don't tell me i'm not responsible
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
Randomize
