Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
Your one and only job is to make sure I am on that bus tomorrow morning with no cat makeup on my face
Went home drunk last night and peed on my Christmas tree, my mothers going to fucking kill me
I'm just saying, no one has ever made me laugh or cum as hard as you do. Sometimes at the same time which I didn't know was possible. Is there even a word for that besides love?
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
At least you get to smell pizza at your job. I just smell despair all day long.
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
I told him I'd ride his broomstick if he let me call him Harry Potter and drew a lightning bolt on his forehead.
I was supremely disappointed in the lack of dick and doughnuts in my life last week.
Let this be a lesson to you, parmesan cheese crumbles are not a good substitute for coffee creamer, no matter how high you are
I know I drink too much cuz "ssssjllapph peneinssesss" automatically comes up in my phone now.
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