Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
Apparently I have a urinal in my bedroom
The sun is so bright. Whhyyyyy. EYES ARE DEAD.
I'm not sure whom I'm texting but I put you in my phone as last nights fuck budy, and I'm just curious if I left my clutch with you?
I'm beer bonging chocolate fondue. That's how my Valentines Day is going.
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
I'll like his pictures on Instagram every once and a while so that when he sees my name he is reminded of the best blow job he's ever gotten.
I left at 4:30 in the morning and I told him it was because I had to take my contacts out
We need to get me chipped asap
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
ONE DAY CAN WE PLEASE HAVE SECRET SEX. PREFERABLY IN AN ANCIENT PYRAMID BUT I'M NOT OPPOSED TO A 4 STAR HOTEL
Randomize
