Apparently mid blow job I started crying telling her how "Wonderful this blow job is"
It honestly took me longer to beat Ninja Turtles: Turtles in Time, than it did to have sex with her the first time we met.
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
Just jerked off with bubble wrap. Not as awesome as it sounds.
At one point 12 people dressed in care bear onesies were up on stage grinding super nasty, and two of the girl Care Bears were making out.
If this wasn't a hallucination, we need to go to this magical kingdom every night of the week.
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
What kind of terrible faithless God would allow vodka and one ply toilet paper to coexist?
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
Woah don't start going all boyfriend on me now, you're here for one thing and one thing only and that's sex, hot shameless sex.
I have a video on my phone of someone streaking in my house last night, do you have any idea who it is?
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
I want to shoot him sideways (so he can still breathe) in the Adam's apple with my little crossbow.
Randomize
