this other lifeguard and I are actually considering paying a kid to shit in the pool
He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
My mom is pretending to be Paula Deen while making breakfast...I'm pretty sure she's sober.
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
It's like God was speaking to me through a penis.
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
You really realize what your life's become when you're sitting alone in the house crying in a santa hat and pjs getting stoned on christmas eve before noon.
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
He is peeing inside and sticking up for himself. Those are two of the four signs of the apocalypse.
Don't be too mad at the guy who broke your kitchen table. Didn't get his name, but he knew all about your gay porn career. Like DETAILS...
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
Randomize
