is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
They were like stripper heels, except business stripper heels, the kind strippers would wear to court.
You can't have your penis and eat it, too.
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
Protocol on turning down a date from someone in the House of Representatives?
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
Yeah. I don't know. I'm just gonna show up at her place on valentines day with a jock strap, box of chocolates, and rose clenched between my ass cheeks with "be mine" written across my glorious man titties.
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
Oh yeah I meant to tell you the Tomb Raider looking girl so crop dusted me on the stairway
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
so in 24 hours i have gotten caught having sex in my car by a cop, almost burnt off my vag, almost got hit by a semi, and got fired. awesome.
Randomize
