Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
i saw the 3rd guy i ever had sex with last night and kept calling him #3
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
thanks for the bloody nose. you probably dont remember, i'm not mad.. only because your boobs are to blame
You may have cured my horniness. I feel like my libido just got shat on by kittens who live on an enchanted rainbow.
You bought champagne and told everyone it was because I'd just found out I was pregnant. How exactly is that being a good wingman?
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
Stop thinking your God dude. You passed out. God doesn't pass out...
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
Gave his drunk ass water, & he poured it on my shirt while saying "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!" When reminded of it today he replied with, "at least you came in first place"
I'm basically doing the Walk of Shame without the added bonus of having sex last night. That doesn't look good on anyone.
Randomize
