wait.. the condom broke. ehh whatever i think im already 2 months pregnant
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
I hate cats. They're so curious, it's not their damn business.
handjob tips. give me some.
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
My therapist says she wants to work on my 'trust issues'. I think she's found the cash cow within.
I woke up under a table, with a huge Mexican sombrero, a box of 120 doughnuts and a bloody nose. It all screams success.
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
I just did a sobriety test in a tutu.
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
Its only 9:11 and I just somersaulted through a window. Its gonna be a good night
Seriously how many times do I have to sleep with him before he stops calling me dude
Also I'm sorry for asking you to shave my vagina for me last night
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
Randomize
