That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
I don't know where your sunglasses are, I was too preoccupied with girls not old enough to drive past midnight.
I'm in the library if you wanna come give me library head.
All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
And I was slip and sliding my life away on a giant tarp with tons of soap and bitches. Priorities man, priorities.
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
My girlfriend is pregnant with her exs baby. 2014 just became the worst year
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
he sent me a green and gold dick pic and advised me I needed to come drive the snake from Ireland.
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
you were so high you asked for half double stack and half crispy chicken sandwich "welded together" in the wendy's drive through
No I’m scared man. She sharted. In my car. Wearing a dress. And I still like her.
Wow
Randomize
