Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
Listen, i'm watching playoff hockey and eating waffles. i just don't have time for your drama today.
A. What the fuck are period panties? B. Don't ever wear them around me... or bears.
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
He said he wanted to make me his Twinkie, "filled with his delicious cream." ABSOLUTELY 100% NO YOU MAY NOT REPEAT ****NOT**** GIVE HIM MY NUMBER EVER EVER EVER. Please confirm receipt and full comprehension of this message.
How the hell do you leave a party with a kitten? It's missing and everyone knows it was you.
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
Dude, you were so wasted she couldn't wait. She was grinding your face while you were passed out in the yard.
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
Just realized my relationship wasn't even Facebook official and I'd already cheated on him. 'Shitty girlfriend' is an understatement.
Booty calls should never involve the cops.
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
Randomize
