It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
surprisingly enough, it isn't that uncomfortable to have sex with a heart monitor on
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
The leasing office is hiring, so I gave them my resume and class schedule. I doubt they'll call me considering last summer at their "exotic animal" pool party I marched in with a funnel and demanded the employees chug. I doubt they've forgotten.
He was the one that got away. From my vagina.
I told him if he went to see magic mike with me I'd cover his eyes during the penis parts
I'm not sure drinking my way through west nile virus is the best idea. Oh well, already committed to that plan.
Honestly, it's his loss. He went for the free sample when he could've gotten the whole package, babes.
does that make me the free sample at the grocery store he didn't like enough to buy...? yeah, that advice didn't help, but thanks.
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
I had the most traumatic dream I've ever had just now. I ripped my dick off because a girl asked me to and spent the rest of the dream crying about my dick
The playlist was "songs to sing in the shower". I literally got fucked to Footloose.
His name isnt in my phone as “Satan’s spawn” for no reason. #devildick
We met behind our asshole boss's back with the intent to oust him from the company. If this revolution is a success, bring nachoes.
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