i miss you and i wish you were peeing between my legs right now. in a platonic way
this is ridiculous... i look like a white version of MC Hammer...
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
oh god was she eating orange peels again
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
I was the only one at the party that didn't get their name taken by the police. I'm convinced that I'm the main character of Ferris Bueller's Drunken Adventures.
That's where the buck stops? Buying girlfriends online? THAT is where you draw the line?!
I left your tip in your mailbox. Last night was amazing.
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
IT'S PERFEFT
... what?
HIS DICK. IT'S PERFECT. BYE.
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