I didn't realize he wasn't circumcised... it looked like the Unibomber...
Are you pooping in the stall next to me?
Maybe....
Cause I just heard a fart and it sounded like one of your farts.
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
i wanted to tell my neighbors to shut up it was 4am, but listening to her rag on him for his minute man routine was actually entertaining
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
Just found my toeprints on the glass of his sunroof.
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
We lost a condom inside me, I had to fish it out. The next day he gave me a Gone Fishin' bumper sticker. True love at its finest.
Taking my underwear off at work was one of my better decisions this weekend
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
It's like my uterus was saying, "hey, you're not pregnant, but imagine if you were!"
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
i woke up in a bed of pop tarts
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