if she shaves her mustache, i'll let her give me head
Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
The bartender laughed but the manager kicked me out when the mom conplained. There's no way my fart harmed that baby in any way
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
I found your knife. It was stuck in my bedroom ceiling.
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
Youre not supposed to get arrested if your parents fly you home for christmas!
True but this has the bonus of them maybe not wanting to fly me home next year, im good with that didnt wanna go in the first place.
oh my god. picked the worst day ever to not wear underwear...
I'm just gonna stop you right there because there is, in fact, no such thing.
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
Finally fucked my buddy's mom!! We are both ten years older and for her it really shows but i hit it!!
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
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