I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
I woke up and my clothes were soaked in the shower and I was wearing a Ghostbusters uniform. I'm shocked she hasn't left me yet.
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
He just gave himself a boner while driving using "the power of his mind"
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
Girl your like that last load of laundry... I'll do you eventually just not tonight.
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
playing nyquil roulette. it entails taking shots of nyquil and hoping it doesnt kick in during sex or in public. game on.
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
I'm drinking your booze since you ate my pop-tarts. I'm telling you this because I still don't think it's a fair trade.
I was high last night eating a fudge bar and making eggs with toast and corned beef hash for a 2 am snack and my dad asked what I was and the only reply I could think of was "I'm an adult."
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
When I was sick she came over with Call of Duty, animal crackers and a handjob. Honor says I can't dump her until Easter
Randomize
