uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
my wrists were so small for the handcuffs, i could slip them off and hand the tow truck driver my keys....
Her eyebrows were plucked so thin that she had to have gonorrhea. Clean girls just don't pluck that way
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
I'm literally in my bed still trying to find the energy to take my corset off so I can binge eat oreos
I just found out that there's a bar that has happy hour at 12 pm. It's like the universe doesn't want me to be sober
I figured you were on something. You're way too happy right now to be sober
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
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