Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
I can see why you broke up with her now... it was like having sex with a corpse.
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
I am more familiar with your toilet than I ever want to be with any appliance
Boobs are also good for catching the vodka gummy bears that miss my mouth
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
He showed up to my apt at 6am wearing a suit and holding a bag of coke....how could I not let him in?
Sorry, Geoff can’t come to his phone right now. He’s outside trying to show his dick to a bachelorette party bus with “DTF” written on the windows
I thought I was drunk because I kept grabbing his arm instead of his dick
But then I realized it wasn’t his arm and that I was very lucky
Randomize