me and this guy in my office just exchanged an "i saw you at a drag show last night" look as he passed by my desk.
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
omg I just had an epiphany about why I grew into such a whore....
HAVE YOU EVER NOTICED WHAT THE SPICE GIRLS USED TO WEAR?!? those were my idols, I never stood a chance
First of all guys don't have walks of shame. Secondly there is nothing more epic than riding the skytrain in a toga while everyone else is going to work
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
Yeah..I guess you know your hair looks like shit when TSA asks to inspect it
I promised him we could have sex if he would let me take him to the hospital to get stitches.
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
I was just going for a one night stand and now I'm at breakfast with his entire family.
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
Well, I guess my plans of staying around the apartment and drinking my weight in boxed wine are ruined. I have a date tonight.
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
Just puked. First it was bright neon blue then it turned to bright lime green. How does that even happen? And wtf was I drinkin last night?
This is the weekend we were supposed to be in Vegas making bad decisions hoping no one got VD, not stuck at home for the 900th day in a row
Randomize
