Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
apparently i was offering everyone ambien and shouting, it's only like heath ledger if you want it to be!
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
Any little, cute, petite blondes with you?
Nah, I got some slutty brunettes though.
He was supposed to take me to a nice dinner, but istead all he did was get drunk and throw lit fireworks at me.
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
I'm pretty sure we got the cab driver deported
I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
I love that my family celebrates every holiday with a joint. Chanukah? Mazel-juana! Easter? What's more spring than the color green? Election day? What better way to celebrate democracy in action than medical pot?
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
Shotgunning beers in the shower. Mom would be proud.
While he was fucking me, he just stopped and said, "Mike says Hi." Then proceeded to fuck me.
What did you do?
What do you say to that!? But, when I came, I screamed out my full name.
Randomize
