I remember spending $50 at Ozzie's on Friday...my Visa remembers $120.
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
Can you explain to me why I woke up with my hands tied to the hotel bed with the phone cord???
I got kicked out of the bar but no one cared, I dont have any money so i stayed outside with the bouncer for an hour and he got so sick of me he let me back in on the condition that i cant leave my seat. VISIT ME
If I EVER think it's a good idea to blow someone who just showed me their synchronized swimming performance on youtube again please correct me immediately.
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
The chick I hooked up with last night is my girlfriend older sister. Who is in town visiting. Who I just met. Who I just had dinner With. Who is here along with their parents and the whole family. How did my luck get so bad?
I specifically found a fat girl to lift me up on her shoulders.\n\nIt was glorious.
Then she said I give the best mouth hugs and bar went silent.
Hey, I took a sweater from your house. And, um, your little brother's virginity.
You were hitting on girls while wearing the banana suit. When they rejected you you yelled "I gotta split anyway."
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
Well the good news of being walked in on, my mom says your tits are pretty. Then she added that hers were like that once. Fml
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