Dude, just got a bummer.
What??
A blow job from a homeless chick.
just survived the first fart of the relationship.
Roman Polanski is more welcome at my daughter's birthday party than you are at that bar
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
Then she called me a home wrecking whore.
dont they live in a condo? that doesnt count.
Hold on. She's wrapped herself in toilet paper and is scaring the dog.
Too many margaritas?
What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
I am too drunk to be out in this weather around all these animals.
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
Randomize