Locked eyes w/ her at mainstreet, and said 'yeah yeah get it!' From there we started violently making out on the dancefloor (I had a FULL boner, ps) and then I got her number
wanna go halves on a baby?
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
I just made a steamroller out of a christmas ornament. I feel so festive.
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
she did 8 shots of vodka. THROUGH A SIPPY STRAW
I have got to meet this girl.
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
I just found peanut butter between my boobs. This was for you.
Good morning beautiful! Wanna steal a cat this weekend?
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