spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
I really shouldn't have to apologize. It was your own damn fault for opening a tab at the bar and telling me about it.
THAT WAS PROBABLY MY ONE CHANCE TO SLEEP WITH A MAN NAMED BORIS AND YOU RUINED IT.
He's. Duct. Taping. His. Phone. To. The. Wall.
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
Sorry blacked out and lost my phone. Judging by the looks of my body I fought a cat and fell into a bush.
Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
I unknowingly motorboated my boyfriend's ex-gf last night. Yay me!
new dating motto: let your guard down, not your panties
She's licking the whiskey out of the carpet. I think we may be soulmates.
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
ill dress up as a sperm donor and you can go as the cup....
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
Randomize
