We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
I have whiskey and jager. There's no telling what kind of monster will emerge
If our text convos ever saw the light of day lives would be in tatters
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
I should have been on a postcard. I was sitting in the middle of the forest with a plate full of pot brownies and missing you.
FUCK... Pulled a chick from the bar went to her house passed out on the shitter. She lives in a house full of girls. They were making poop jokes as i left
These freshman guys were trying to holler at me from their window, and I realized about 20 minutes too late that the best possible reaction at that time would've been screaming "FLACCID PENIS". Oh, and I found this awesome zombie charm bracelet you would love.
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
Blowing a married man is so much more important than a 12 year olds basketball game.
Not sure if your roommate speaks German while sleeping, or if she woke up, figured out we were fucking, and used German to swear at us.
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
Fuck. I think I can already feel tomorrow's hangover. It's like future me cane back to warn present me about the impending doom but didn't turn the time dial back far enough.
I miss seeing you
i hope for the sake of your safety you were not with your girlfriend while sending texts like that at 3 am
Literally just stood behind a guy in line at Walmart get his card declined when he attempted to purchase condoms. That's rock bottom.
Randomize